The thing…

I have this thing… yea, that’s what I’ll call it, a “thing” (very descriptive I know but bare with me here)

Its more of an issue really, or a problem,... I have this problem in that I find it hard to say no to authority figures… especially in the heat of the moment.

When did I discover this you ask? And more importantly, why do I suddenly feel the need to disclose this information to you? – its simple really, ever since I can possibly remember and, well… we’ll get to that last part in a minute…

I think I need help *insert scared, slightly abashed ‘I didn’t do it’ face here*

As I mentioned though, its not a new problem. I mean its always been there, its just that up until now all its cost me is my spare time and mental health… like that time in year 11 on my first day back at school after a 3 ½ week tour of Europe (representing the school) when I had one week to catch up and prepare for final exams and assessments, and just about 2 weeks before my complete meltdown.

When my school’s religious education co-coordinator cornered me in the corridor and ‘politely requested’ that I prepare a presentation about the trip – you know, a speech, and slideshow with some pic’s and music… that kind of thing – for the next whole school assembly. Oh! And btw, its this Wednesday… who’s reply to my paltry excuses and lack of time was “Oh it’ll only take you 30 minutes or so”…

*blank non-emotional face hiding a litany of emotions, none of which should ever be expressed verbally infront of a teacher, followed almost instantly with a smile*

“sure”

*Walks off and has the sudden urge to hide in a small dark corner singing somewhere over the rainbow until the world disappears along with everything in it*

Yup, its definitely not a new issue, but up until now it has only cost me my free time and mental health… but now, oh no, now that it has resulted in my hip pocket is feeling decidedly lighter… something MUST be done! This hast to STOP!!!

So, what was the straw that finally broke the camels back? What did Darcy do?!

Oh I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you alright… here it is… are you sure your ready? Yes? Oh no, of course you not… I have to set the scene first (now, now no groaning, this won’t take long)

It was a cloudy Friday morning, the Friday morning that followed the Monday and Thursday night end of semester exams and preceded the Following Friday night exam. For some reason on this particular day Darcy decides that it would be the perfect time to end the gross abuse and neglect she’d been inflicting on car over the last 2 years by ‘forgetting’ to wash and vacuum it. To Finally ‘suck it up’ and pay for someone else to do her dirty work.

The only problem is that its 9:30am and her sister Ariel has just left for a hair cut, taking the car in question and leaving Darcy with the other family car… it was a sign, I can see this now, but at the time it was only thought of as a slight inconvenience…

No problem, Darcy drives to the shops to swap cars, Oh! And while we’re here why not get the old eyebrows waxed (as it was getting kinda hard to see through the bushes – if you know what I mean). So now Darcy has red, slightly puffy skin surrounding her upper eyelids as she ventures towards the car park to collect her poor car. The fuel thing-a-mijigy is on empty so a trip to the petrol station is also in order for a fill-up (even though its not a cheap day – hey when you’re a stingy uni student these things matter!) and tyre pump (hey, if its going to be a ‘fix the car’ day, why not go all out? Right?!...) That’s it by the way… there’s your clue right there… its all going to hell…

Anywho, she then ventures home to remove all personal items and large pieces of rubbish that have accumulated over time (as tends to happen when you have 2 adolescents sharing a car – no one takes responsibility) and then drives down to her local car wash café…

So Darcy has just parked her car and is immediately greeted by a salesman… Darcy wants a $20 wash and vacuum… sales man wants a polish… sales man wins… 67 dollars later… (in my defense my eyebrows were still a little raw and I just wanted to run and hide… not the transaction would in reality have gone any other way even if I was 100%, but that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it! And after all… the car deserves some TLC after 2 years of neglect)

So now Darcy is sitting in the café reading her book when from behind her comes a mysterious voice “excuse me, are you the girl with the white car?”… yes… “could you come with me please”… Oh no, what now? I knew it I knew it, something terrible, all the paint has washed off or something… this was a bad idea, I should never have gotten out of bed this morning…

Now in Darcy’s mind she is already feeling very guilty and just a touch paranoid *everyone is looking at me. They all know that I’m the one with the bruised and battered car… they’re judging me… looking down their noses like they are so superior… well I saved the environment by not wasting water. Okay!*

In all seriousness thought, “if we polish your car its just going to make it worse, you need a full detailing”…

*they’re looking, just staring… everybody is just waiting for me to stuff up*…
“Ummm… okay? How much will it cost me?”

“Oh, we’ll do you a good price… very good price…”

A further $223 later… (that’s 300 in total!!!)… Darcy is feeling a little sheepish… opps!

For the record though… the car looks great, better than it has in decades… Sunnyboy is jealous… in hindsight it was necessary, just with I’d been prepared for it…

Until next time
D.